the aisle of the bus to rip the baby out of his mother’s arms. But she couldn’t. She wouldn’t. Knowing what she knew now about Lady PussyKat, and what she thought she was about to find out about the way their two fates were intertwined, she could no longer bear to think about breaking the bond between mother and child.
Anna shoved the door to her apartment open with her shoulder. The light on her answering machine was blinking. It was probably her sister calling again or one of those annoying credit card minions calling to tell her she owed them money in words she couldn’t even understand. She ignored the light and slumped into the chair at her makeshift cardboard dining room table, adding the latest nursing home brochure and the business card from the Golden Cherry Inn to her pile.
She flipped through the glossy nursing home brochures, the photo from the 50’s that was so yellow it looked like it had been soaked in tea for a decade, and the tiny matchbook with the letters LPC shimmering in silver script. As her fingers grazed the silvery letters, she remembered the day she’d found the matchbook and picture tucked away in her mother’s old flute case just 6 months ago.
“Ughh… What the hell am I gonna do now? FUCK!” She slammed her fist against the table, spilling her pile onto the gritty wood floor.
Anna knew she’d never have the answers she needed if she stopped now. She bent down to pick the papers up and then she saw it. She’d looked at that picture a million times since she’d found it, how could she have missed something so important? She bent closer to the ground in disbelief.
Woah! What did she miss?! What did she miss?! . . . I love that you left it lingering, just as Eric did in the previous post. That way we really have to work together to keep these scenes flowing and not appearing as separate entities! I think whoever is next should not answer this question right away, and maybe we should not answer it at all considering its the first chapter. Maybe whoever is next starts from the next morning or a week later or something. . . ? . . . .
ReplyDeleteDayna - that is a great post! I love how you included more details of her search and made it more concrete. Now why were these items in her mother's old flute case? That will be interesting for later chapters. I cannot wait to find out what she missed in the photograph.
ReplyDeleteGreat addition, Dayna! You've left us in a great deal of suspense! Can't wait to see why the items were in the flute case, what was in the picture.
ReplyDeleteGood for you for leaving something for the next poster to pick up on. Next entry really needs to address the pregnancy. By this point, a reader could have forgotten that Anna is pregnant, it's been so long since we mentioned it.
ReplyDeleteLove the suspense. Is LP creepin' in the background or something?
ReplyDeleteNice post.
Great job with this post, Dayna! I'm really intrigued by the matchbox that Anna found 6 months ago. I think this scene offers a lot of information about Anna and her past without being too convoluted. Great job!
ReplyDeleteNice job, Dayna. I hope that the next person at least addresses what was in the picture--that's something that needs to be answered immediately.
ReplyDeleteI am a fan of the suspense as well. I believe this is a nice example of what Chantel talks about when she indicates "pacing" in a piece of fiction. We are getting close to the climax of the chapter, and it makes sense that a useful object, with information previously unknown to the main character, is what moves the character to action. Looks like the photo will reveal something about LP, her family, and insight into Anna's character through her action.
ReplyDelete